Traditions

Published January 1, 2020 by Malia

During my twenties, every January 1st was spent marathoning the entire extended Lord of the Rings. While it is possible to do in one sitting, now that I’ve gotten a bit older I’ve discovered it’s also super exhausting. Then, I turned 30, and the tradition changed.

Tom and I had been together almost a year. We were engaged, and it was our first New Year’s Eve. I worked that night, but was done around nine or ten. I drove to Tom’s. He got a bunch of pizza and we sat up half the night eating and playing Diablo 3. Since then, every New Year’s Eve we’ve gotten pizza and played Diablo. Nothing like ringing in the new year by slaying hordes of demons.

This year, tradition shifted. Last night, we went out on New Year’s Eve. Nothing super fancy. Taco Bell and Star Wars. I’ve had a nasty respiratory infection, so it was both super fun and incredibly exhausting.

Today, I’m keeping quiet. Trying to continue getting better. So, we’re doing pizza, Diablo, and rewatching the Clone Wars series. Again, it’s nothing exciting, but it is pleasant and a lovely way to start the new year.

It’s been a long weird decade

Published December 31, 2019 by Malia

12/31/09. If you had asked me what my life would look like ten years in the future, I would’ve given you an answer that bears little resemblance to what actually happened.

How has it turned out? Let me see…

-I’ve lived in two different states.

-I’ve worked in two different medical labs.

-I got married.

-I discovered that I’m actually a dog person (I still like cats, but dogs are my favorite).

-I’ve discovered a genuine love of crafting.

-I’ve had two surgeries.

-I’ve had miscarriages.

-I’ve lost the best grandparents in the world.

-I’ve experienced evolution of relationships with both family and friends.

-I’ve learned to think for myself.

-I’ve learned hard truths about myself.

-I’ve been given gifts I never expected that have quite literally changed my life and given me back hope that I lost long ago.

Life has mountains and valleys. The last decade was filled with mostly valley, and as much as it hurt, as much as it tried to destroy me, I’m ending the decade able to say, “I’m still here.” I can’t say I’m ending the decade a better person, but I’m definitely ending it more self-aware and in touch with the world around me.

So, what about the next ten years? Honestly, I don’t know what life will look like a decade from now. If God gives me another ten years (which I really pray He does), I know that I don’t want to waste them. I don’t want to reach 12/31/29 and find that I’ve accomplished nothing. I do know that for the first time in my life I have a dream of something that I want to do, that’s not just a pipe dream (I know I’m being a bit vague, and I intend to flesh this out in upcoming posts). I know that I have certain talents, and I’ve got a calling on my heart to use those talents, and to give. I know what gives me joy, and what my purpose is. Now the trick is to dive in and not give into my fear of failure.

I survived the decade.

I want to thrive in the next.

Whether the weather is hot, Whether the weather is cold, We’ll be together, whatever the weather, Whether we like it or not.

Published January 29, 2019 by Malia

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Hello, Polar Vortex.

Something’s been bugging me today. What is it about weather that makes us all so competitive?

What do I mean by competitive? Try telling someone who lives at least one state north of you that it’s cold. You will be met with a response along the lines of, “Really? You think it’s cold? Try walking to class when it’s -20. Your sweat will literally freeze. You have no idea just how cold, cold can be.” Mention that the weather is miserably hot and you’ll get, “It’s not really that hot. Right now, in Afghanistan, it’s 120 in the shade.”

I have lived all over the mid-west. I’ve lived through tornadoes, blizzards, and 100% humidity. I lived in North Dakota and walked to class in -20, and, yes, my sweat did freeze (it was super weird when I got inside and experienced the thaw of the sweat. I know, I know, tmi.). I lived in southern Illinois, and remember school getting cancelled for what, once I lived in Nebraska I learned, is considered a dusting of snow. I lived in Kansas, and while everyone else spent the winter bundled up in heavy coats, I was perfectly comfortable in a hoodie (there was only one time that I agreed that it was downright freezing). I live in Nebraska, and every year the weather gets even weirder. Right now it’s -5 outside, this coming Sunday it’s supposed to be 50, and a week from now they’re saying it’ll be 25 and snowing.

Personally, I prefer the cold to the heat. You can always put on more clothes, and throw an extra blanket or two on the bed. When it’s hot, you can only take off so much, and even then it’s still too hot.

I don’t know why weather brings out the competitive side of humans, but it always does. It’s like we’re determined to prove that we’re the toughest because we’re surviving a particular weather condition.

The only thing I know for sure, is that it doesn’t matter if you live in Florida, North Dakota, or anywhere in between, once it rains or snows, everyone forgets how to drive.

Mother Forking Shirtballs, I just want to go to sleep.

Published January 28, 2019 by Malia

I’m trying so hard to get to sleep, and it’s just not happening. I went to bed at 9:30, and as I write this it’s now 12:20 a.m. I’m crazy exhausted, and yet annoyingly awake. Too tired to stay sitting upright, so I’m in bed.

Here’s what it’s like in my all over the place ADHD head right now (thoughts are in order of appearance, not order of logic. I don’t know how I skip so wildly from one thing to the other, I just do):

-I should totally make a Fairy Tail guild mark blanket. It wouldn’t be that hard.

-I’ve already got two blankets in progress. I should probably finish one before starting another.

-Yeah, probably, but I really want to make it.

-Just finish something, I’m begging you…wait what is that?

-Why is the song from Back to the Future playing? I thought Tom was watching Flash.

-Oh, it is Flash, must be something time travelly happening.

-I just want to sleep.

-Man, I have not watched Back to the Future in forever. I should watch it this week. Also, I really need to catch up on Flash.

-So, how much yarn would my Fairy Tail blanket take? It’s gotta be less than the temperature blanket.

-Gracie Groot, was that you? Oh yeah, totally you. Why are you farting so much?

-Okay, the TV is driving me to distraction. So much input just being flung at my ears. I need to invest in some new earplugs.

-I have so much stuff to make. What do people even want to buy?

-People will want to buy, right?

-I feel like there’s angst happening on Flash. Music is all angsty and characters sounded equally angsty.

-I can’t believe Tom got ahead of me in Pokemon Go. I’m going to need to play so much more so I can hit level 40 before he does. Seriously, how did he get ahead of me?

-I need more yarn.

-And I’m still awake.

-5:30 is going to get here way too quick.

-I want pie.

When Life Feels Too Much

Published January 24, 2019 by Malia

I woke up at 4 a.m. this morning, and it took me until 9:30 a.m. to drag myself out of bed. I’m struggling right now. And it occurs to me that I’m probably not the only one.

If you are…

-Trying to figure out how you’re going to pay bills with money you don’t have

-Rationing your meds because even if you do have insurance, you can’t afford refills

-Eating as little as possible, cause groceries are an expense you can’t really afford right now

-Feeling strangled by your debts

-Stressed out because you keep trying to do things the right way, and life just keeps knocking you down

-A payment or more behind on your mortgage and/or bills

-Terrified your utilities are going to get turned off

-Wondering how you’re going to buy diapers

-Exhausted by your school loans

-Questioning how far your car can get on less than a quarter of a tank of gas

-Going through something I haven’t listed

-Feeling overwhelmed by everything, and considering just giving up

Then, let me say, you’re not alone. I know there are a ton of people struggling right now. Please, don’t give up. Eventually, things will get better. I know that sounds like an empty platitude, but I’ve been down this road before, and I know that things will turn around.

If you’re genuinely considering ending it all, please reach out for help. Call 1-800-273-8255 to reach the Suicide Prevention Lifeline. If talking on the phone isn’t your comfort zone, text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line.

And if you’re in a season of life where things are going along pretty smoothly, please be willing to be there for those around you who are having a rough time.

It’s entirely possible I’ve completely lost my mind.

Published January 23, 2019 by Malia

When I was growing up, every summer my family would come home to Nebraska for two weeks to see family. One of the days we were back, would be spent getting a watermelon, and going to Guide Rock, to see my Great Grandma B. She passed away when I was ten, so I don’t have tons of memories of her, but the ones I do have are precious.

Great Grandma B was a short and sweet lady. She always had cookies in the cookie jar, a giant garden, and there was always a jigsaw puzzle in progress. Even though I never worked on a puzzle with her, I was always in awe of them. When she passed away, I was allowed to have a few of her puzzles, and that’s when my love affair with jigsaws began.

I drove my mom absolutely batty over the years because I constantly wanted to have a jigsaw going, but my incredibly short attention span meant that it would take me months to complete one. As I got older, I fell off doing puzzles, but that didn’t mean I stopped loving them. Then, last spring, I stumbled across a group on Facebook where people were sharing their completed jigsaws. I wanted to share, so I joined and jumped back into puzzling. In the last year, I’ve completed a pile of puzzles, and when registration for the 2019 Global Jigsaw Jubilee opened, I signed up. I’d seen people’s completed puzzles from the 2018 Jubilee, and something competitive inside me had awoken. I wanted to prove that I’m just as awesome a puzzler as all those others who’ve participated.

The event starts on 1/29, so I have five days left to prepare. Here’s the puzzles I’m planning to work on:

I intend to start with the Ravensburger, simply because I think it will prove to be the easiest.

Putting together the little squares of images should prove *fingers crossed* relatively easy.

Next up will be the DC Comics puzzle:

Considering how much we love DC in this house, this puzzle is a must do. (Points to you if you can name everyone in the image without help. I can name at least half, but I know Tom could name them all if asked).

After that, I head into more challenging waters. The Disney Kinkade puzzles:

These are two of my favorite Disney princess movies. Most of my life Beauty & the Beast was my favorite, but it was dethroned when Tangled came along. Tangled and Moana are currently tied at the top of my favorites list.

Finally, I’m going to tackle this monster:

3000 pieces of Star Trek magic.

Here’s the thing, I’ve never completed a puzzle bigger than 1000 pieces. I’m not too concerned about the 1500 piece ones, but that 3000 piece one is definitely going to test my abilities. Going in, I know that the Ravensburger and Aquarius puzzles will have the best fitting, best condition pieces. The Disney puzzles are Ceaco brand, and if previous experience with Ceaco is any indicator, I’ll get a bit frustrated. Their puzzles are beautiful, but pieces are usually not great. Here’s hoping that this will be a fun experience!

Catnip for Kids

Published January 5, 2019 by Malia

About a week ago, I agreed to something crazy. I said I’d babysit my two nephews (ages 5 & 4) and niece (age almost 2) for 1–2 hours yesterday. All by myself. The only time I’d ever babysat them by myself before was one night when their mom was gone and their dad needed to run to the store. They were already all asleep at that point, so I was basically just making sure there was a responsible adult in the house.

I was really nervous. Much as I want to be a mom, I’m not great with kids. I blame the fact that I grew up a very sheltered only child. I had cousins, but they all lived hundreds of miles away. I was constantly surrounded by adults. I always feel awkward when talking with kids. I either talk way over their heads, or I talk down to them. So, the prospect of being alone with three small children, two of which can be quite strong-willed and rambunctious, was daunting. I had agreed to do it, so I pushed through the anxiety and showed up at their house yesterday morning.

And I discovered something really weird.

I had thought the kids would like the GoNoodle videos. I was introduced to them a few months ago by a teacher friend. The music is so fun, and the dances are really easy. My idea was to wear the children out. Turns out Aunt Malia was the only one who was dancing.

The boys requested to watch a video that was nothing but hands opening packages of little dinosaur transformer-type figures. That was the entire video. The hands held up a package, opened it, showed the toy to the camera, and then moved onto another package.

I had heard that unboxing videos were super popular with kids, but I had never before witnessed it. The rumors are true, kids are obsessed with them. It was while watching a video of a jungle animal toy set being unboxed and put together that I realized all three children were sitting quietly, entranced by the scene before them. Who are these children, and what have they done with my nephews and niece?

I was genuinely baffled by how fascinated the kids were by watching a stranger open and play with toys. Even more bewildering? These videos had millions of views. Which means my nephews and niece aren’t the only ones obsessed.

Back to the fields, you peasant!

Published January 3, 2019 by Malia

This Christmas, I received one of those 23 & Me DNA testing kits. I hadn’t ever planned to get one, because I know that I’m not guaranteed super accurate results. However, since it was a gift, I figured it didn’t hurt to give it a try.

Now, as far as ancestry testing goes, I’m expecting to see results that place me as being mostly European. I’m definitely built like someone you’d expect to see working the fields hundreds of years ago. From doing genealogy research, I know that there’s German, Czech, English, Scottish, Welsh, and Irish in my background. I’m curious to see what results I get regarding Jewish, Mediterranean, and African ancestry. I have my suspicions, but so far haven’t turned up anything concrete in my own personal research.

I have absolutely no idea what to expect from the health report.

I sent in the kit last week. I don’t think I’ve ever intentionally spit that much in my entire life. As of yesterday, according to the app, my specimen is currently in the genotyping stage. Sometime between January 14th and the end of the month, I should have my results.

If you’ve done this type of testing, I’d be curious to hear what your experience was. Did you find out anything surprising? Meet any new family members?

I’ll fill y’all in once I get my report back.

It’s the end of the year, as we know it.

Published December 31, 2018 by Malia

Photo by Anna-Louise on Pexels.com

Here it is.

New Year’s Eve 2018.

Oh, 2018, what can I say about you? You’ve not been a particularly good year, but you definitely haven’t been the worst year. I’ve learned a lot this year, and as cheesy as it sounds, I’ve definitely grown as a person. I’ve learned so much about myself. I’ve stepped up and taken ownership of my life. It’s been a scary, exhausting experience, but something that needed to happen.

I’m looking forward to 2019. I have plans for this blog. I have plans for my life. I have plans to drink a ton of coffee.

You may notice a few changes to this site. I’ll be documenting my jigsaw puzzles, and I’ll be keeping a daily log as I try my hand at making a temperature blanket. I know that every year I make the pronouncement that I’m going to keep this blog more up to date, but this time I actually have a plan. Crazy, right?

Finally, we’ve been talking about it for years, and have finally tried it. We have a podcast! Tom & Malia Have A Podcast. That’s right, the Boy has a name, and it’s only taken me almost five years to reveal it. There’s only one episode, so far, and I know it’s a bit rough. It’s fifteen minutes of us talking about the new Aquaman movie, and because I’m easily distracted, Spiderverse comes up as well. This will be a learning experience, but should be a fun journey.

And that’s about it for now. It’s almost time for the annual New Year’s Eve Diablo 3 gaming session.

See y’all in 2019!

You may be weird, but are you ‘make a fake baby announcement to celebrate your new instrument’ weird?

Published July 17, 2018 by Malia

I’m so exhausted right now, but the house is making weird noises, and the dog is restless, and it’s all very unsettling. It was really unnerving when she sat on the bed and stared at the door and refused to budge. Thanks, dog, I need more anxiety…

Here’s a fun fact about my youth that quite a lot of people don’t know. I mean, the people that were around in my youth know, but anyone who met me after summer of ’03 is unaware of this. Actually, I just realized I have to start this story back before I was born.

I was born into a musical family. My mom plays piano, drums, and autoharp, and she has one of the most beautiful voices in the world. My dad played the tuba in the Navy band, but he was also in a country western band that the Navy sent out to play gigs. He and my mom had their own band as well. This all was years before I was around.

Growing up my folks played and sang together a lot. Once I got old enough, their duo turned into a trio. Mom played autoharp, dad played guitar, banjo, and mandolin. We’d sing together at all kinds of things. Churches, town festivals, nursing homes, etc… After I moved out to go to college, we didn’t really play and sing together anymore. Every great once in a while we’d do a number, but it was a rarity.

Recently, the instruments have come out, and we’ve been practicing again (with a few new additions to the group. We’re now a quintet).

Dad rocking the banjo

Mom makes it look so easy (it’s not)

A little over a week ago, I got to rehearsal early, and I was watching my dad play the banjo. A thought suddenly struck me, in my nearly 34 years of life, I’d never asked to try the banjo. I’d tried every other instrument in the house, but the banjo always seemed almost sacred to me. I think it had something to do with it being such a part of my dad, I didn’t want to accidentally damage it. Besides which, I’ve had years of epic fails trying to play stringed instruments (I have fat, small, stubby hands which doesn’t help at all). The closest I get to even minor success is the piano. I’m a brass and woodwind girl. Give me any of those instruments and I’m golden. I’m not tooting my own horn (pun definitely intended), I really do have a gift when it comes to brass and woodwind instruments. They just make sense to me.

Anyway, back to my story…I’m sitting there, and I asked my dad if I can try the banjo. He handed it over to me, equiped me with picks and gave me a very brief lesson on how to pick. And y’know what? My fingers understood. My parents were thrilled.

I didn’t think much more about it, until last Saturday. Last Saturday, I was given a precious gift. My own banjo. I was given it, with the explanation that “You need to get the music back in your heart.” Which was much more true than I wanted to acknowledge. I’m realising that I’ve tried to purge almost everything to do with music from my life, which would probably shock those who knew me years ago. I don’t handle emotional pain well, I box it up and hide it deep inside myself.

I’ve been practicing everyday. There’s something very soothing about practicing the picking pattern dad taught me. Trying to play the assbutt C chord is less soothing. D isn’t much better. A7 is awesome, but open G is my current favorite. Yesterday, in an attempt to be funny, I posted the following image to Instagram:

Kermit, of course, is in honor of Kermit the Frog; and Martin is because of Steve Martin. Two very important banjo players (apart from my dad).

So, now I play banjo. 2018 has definitely had it’s fair share of surprises.

Any Second Now...

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