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Difficult Anniversaries

Published April 18, 2014 by ia84

I realized a few days ago that the last time I attended Good Friday service was in 2011.  My aunt’s church was doing this living Last Supper thing.  It was actually pretty cool.  It was a drama, where the actors did a tableau of DaVinci’s last supper, and each character got to explain which disciple he was, and talk about his role in the story.

As usual, my grandparent’s were in town for Easter, and they went with us to the presentation.  I knew Grampa wasn’t feeling fantastic, but he was determined to go to church that night.  The next day, Saturday, he got progressively worse; and that evening,  my aunt took him to the ER.

I spent the better part of that Easter Sunday with my family in the ICU.  Grampa was in really rough shape, and we really thought that was the end of the road.  It wasn’t, but it was the definite beginning of the end.  He passed away in July of 2012.

The month and a half following that Easter Sunday, I spent a good portion of almost every single day at the hospital and then at the rehab center (after he was released from the hospital).  Looking back, it was a surreal, but incredibly educational experience.

Anyway, like I said, that was the last Good Friday service I went to.  Now, I love Easter.  Being a Christian, the holiday has a lot more meaning for me than just bunnies and chickens and chocolate (however, I never turn down chocolate).  This year I realized that I’ve made zero effort to try to get to Good Friday service since 2011, and I think I’ve finally narrowed down why.  That service in 2011, was pretty much the last time I saw my Grampa even be close to his old self.  Watching him get sicker and constantly waiting for the inevitable phone call was overwhelming.

It’s a weird to think of it as an anniversary, but it is.  And, this year, it’s not one I’m handling terribly well.  I’m really sad.  I miss people in my family being healthy.  I miss my Grampa.  I even miss being a pastor’s kid (although, I’m not sure I’ll ever stop thinking of myself as a pastor’s kid.  I spent 19 years as one, it’s a part of me that I can’t separate from).

Eventually, I’ll go to Good Friday service again, but not this year.

Where’s My Weekend?

Published March 7, 2013 by ia84

It’s that time of year again.  “Weekend to Remember” time again.

Let me explain.

Every year, for approximately a month, my church will bring up “Weekend to Remember,” reminding all the married couples that this is something they should look into going to.  Best as I understand it, it’s a weekend where a married couple gets together with other married couples to learn about being married, and to spend quality one on one time with each other remembering why they got married in the first place.  With some couples, this seems like a good idea, but I’m thinking that there are probably some couples out there who’d much rather not remember why they got married, and if they do remember it’s going to cause more strife than lovey-dovey-ness.  What do I know, though?  I’m not married, so I can’t really offer any true judgement or expert opinion on these sorts of things.

This has gotten me to thinking.  There really isn’t much available to Christian singles.  Why is it that married couples have so many resources and weekends and classes available to them, but singles are pretty much left on their own?  Are we considered less in need of help and support, simply because we have sole control over the remote?

On top of that, I decided to try Googling resources available to single Christians, and it’s amazing how many dating sites came up for me.  When I tried looking for support, the pages I found mostly looked cheesy and archaic, and were filled with ads for dating sites.  Plus, I’ve yet to encounter a book for single Christians that isn’t focused on dating/courting.  Don’t misunderstand me, all these things are good and have a purpose, but where is the support system?  I want guidance on how to exist as a single person in the day to day world.  I want to be encouraged that I’m just as valuable a human being without a man as I would be with one.

I’m not really sure where I’m going with this train of thought (I know, I know, great thing to admit on something being published to be read by the general public), so maybe I just need time to process this.