It’s that time of year again. “Weekend to Remember” time again.
Let me explain.
Every year, for approximately a month, my church will bring up “Weekend to Remember,” reminding all the married couples that this is something they should look into going to. Best as I understand it, it’s a weekend where a married couple gets together with other married couples to learn about being married, and to spend quality one on one time with each other remembering why they got married in the first place. With some couples, this seems like a good idea, but I’m thinking that there are probably some couples out there who’d much rather not remember why they got married, and if they do remember it’s going to cause more strife than lovey-dovey-ness. What do I know, though? I’m not married, so I can’t really offer any true judgement or expert opinion on these sorts of things.
This has gotten me to thinking. There really isn’t much available to Christian singles. Why is it that married couples have so many resources and weekends and classes available to them, but singles are pretty much left on their own? Are we considered less in need of help and support, simply because we have sole control over the remote?
On top of that, I decided to try Googling resources available to single Christians, and it’s amazing how many dating sites came up for me. When I tried looking for support, the pages I found mostly looked cheesy and archaic, and were filled with ads for dating sites. Plus, I’ve yet to encounter a book for single Christians that isn’t focused on dating/courting. Don’t misunderstand me, all these things are good and have a purpose, but where is the support system? I want guidance on how to exist as a single person in the day to day world. I want to be encouraged that I’m just as valuable a human being without a man as I would be with one.
I’m not really sure where I’m going with this train of thought (I know, I know, great thing to admit on something being published to be read by the general public), so maybe I just need time to process this.
I totally get what you’re saying. Being single and a Christian I used to be super frustrated about what you’re talking about. But something occurred to me while reading your post. Do you really need that label of being single?
Wouldn’t the void of a marriage retreat be filled with a retreat that focuses on your relationship on Christ, one that applies regardless of your relationship status?
I think when most people identify themselves as “single”, they’re looking for a way to change that.
So, my question for you is—
do you really feel like you need a retreat solely focused for those who aren’t married, or
do you feel excluded?
I think my feelings are more ones of general frustration at the exclusion of the “single” Christian group (me included). I had never given much thought to it before, but it just really hit me this year how little non-dating things are available to this group. Everyone (including the internet) seems desperate to get us to change our status. As if we can’t serve God well unless we’re under the bonds of matrimony. I was kind of joking about there being a retreat for “singles,” it was more a general reference to the fact that there just isn’t much available, and yet there’s plenty available to those who’ve said “I do.” The balance just doesn’t seem right, especially since people are staying single longer, and the single population is fairly decent sized. Like I said, I’m still processing my thoughts on this. Thank you so much for reading and commenting! I appreciate the questions, they truly do help me gather my thoughts!
Thanks for posting! it made me reevaluate some of my own thoughts and similar frustrations