aliens

All posts tagged aliens

Don’t invite Charles Dickens to your seance.

Published September 29, 2015 by ia84

I am thoroughly convinced that my office is haunted.  Up until last week, though, I hadn’t mentioned it to anyone because I didn’t want people to think I was any crazier than I actually am. 

The way my office is situated, I sit right next to the door, but when I’m on the phone, my back is mostly turned towards the door.  Now, it’s not unusual for people to walk in to drop off results, or other things that need my attention, and if I’m on the phone they’ll usually leave the item on the file cabinet behind me.  Since it’s such a small office, whenever anyone walks in, I can feel the movement of air as they pass behind me.  On a regular basis, I’ll find myself taking a phone call and will feel someone walk in and stand behind me.  However, when I hang up the phone, no one is standing there. 

Like I said in the beginning, I’ve not been mentioning this oddness, but now I know I’m not the only one experiencing weirdness. 

Last week, I came back from my lunch break, and my coworker (we share an office) asked me if the blinds had been closed when she arrived.  I told her they were, that I had closed them mid-morning because the sun was beating in and I wanted to try to keep it semi-cool.  She then told me that when she was on the phone, she could have sworn that someone opened the blinds, but when she looked at them they were closed.  We then sat and discussed the fact that this room seems haunted.
I know there’s a reasonable explanation for most everything.  Me thinking that someone is walking behind me is likely the by-product of a change in the air pressure.  My co-worker thinking the blinds were opened was probably the sun hitting them just right.  However, I know that there are some things in this world that are just unexplainable. 

When I shared with the boy that I’m relatively certain my office is haunted, I was met with a decent amount of skepticism. 

To be fair, I understand his skepticism.  He’s been fully exposed to my super overactive imagination.  A few weeks ago, I spent the entire evening watching Mysteries at the Museum and Mysteries at the Monuments, and when it was time to feed the cat and go to bed I freaked out.  I made the boy walk me to the basement and stand there while I fed the cat, and when we went to bed, I wouldn’t let him turn out the lights until I was securely in bed…safe from Charles Dickens’ ghost and aliens.  Mostly from the aliens.  I’m not too concerned about Dickens, unless he decides Great Expectations needs another ending.

 I remember him wearily asking me, “Now, you’re scared of history?”

In my head my reply went something like, “Of course I am.  If we don’t fear the terrible things from the past, how will we learn and not allow such horrors to take place in the future?”  What I actually said went more, “Protect me from the aliens!”

At that point he rolled his eyes, sighed  (I’m sure he was envisioning the future filled with him having to protect me from every ridiculous thing I see on t.v. that’s even slightly scary), and went to sleep.  Leaving me to fight the aliens off with my pillow.

And that is why I understand his reluctance to believe my office is haunted…but it totally is. 

Did You Actually Go To Medical School?

Published August 16, 2014 by ia84

When I was in elementary school, I remember classmates circulating a story about a man who had gone in for surgery, and when he woke up he was missing a leg.  Depending on the person telling the story, he either lost both legs, or an arm and a leg, or both legs and both arms.  I’m pretty sure that at some point, in some telling of the tale, he woke up as the Headless Horseman (and was probably missing all his limbs as well).  I learned two things from this, A. Kid’s imaginations are kind of a gruesome playground, and, B. Don’t have surgery, because the doctor will mix you up with another patient and you WILL die (sans all limbs).

When I was in vet tech school, I remember sitting in surgical procedures class, and having a teacher tell us that it was super important to count all your gauze pads-and anything else that came into contact with the patient-before the patient got stitched up, because you didn’t want Fluffy coming back in for having a sponge left inside her accidentally (and having a severe infection from the foreign body).

You always hear stories like this, and I think on some level I didn’t quite believe them until a few years ago when my grampa was staying at a rehab center after surgery.  Two days before he was due to be released, the nurse gave him another patient’s meds.  Turned out that the other patient was taking high levels of morphine.  I’ve always hoped no one got my grampa’s meds, because he was taking large quantities of Coumadin (a blood thinner, for those who aren’t familiar with it).  Grampa ended up back in the hospital for a few days, and his release date got pushed back another week.

All of these things were enough to make me a little nervous about healthcare, but it wasn’t until I started working at the lab that I truly got scared of healthcare.

Now, let me just point out that there are absolutely amazing and fantastic nurses and doctors out there.  My goal here is not to bash, or cast out a net and say, “All healthcare professionals are this way.”  There are people who truly know what they’re doing and do an excellent job at it.  However, in the last year and a half, I’ve started to wonder how many of them there actually are.

I really love my job.  The work is interesting, and I’ve learned far more in the last year and a half than I ever learned in school.  I work in a medical reference lab.  We’re responsible for running tests that doctor’s offices and hospitals can’t run in-house.  I don’t personally perform any of the testing (I’d need a medical lab tech degree for that, and all I have is my vet tech degree and training as a phlebotomist), but I work in the processing department.  Instead of a long drawn out explanation, just think of it as a combination of quality assurance and client care.  I seem to spend a fair amount of time on the phone with clients, and for every call that is smooth and easy to work through, there seem to be about twenty that make you wish you were having a root canal instead.

For example, recently, I had to call a stat result to a doctor.  Not only did this doctor have zero people skills, but when I told him what I was calling about, what the test was, and what the result of the test was along with the normal reference ranges, he said, “I don’t understand what that means.”  It was all I could do not to reply, “You ordered this test!  This is your patient!  What do you mean you don’t understand?!”  Fortunately, it wasn’t a very unusual test, and after about five minutes I was able to explain it well enough to him that he seemed to have grasped whatever it was he didn’t understand.  I hung up the phone and just sat there feeling pity for his patients.

The thing is, those kinds of calls are not out of the norm.  A few weeks ago, one of my co-workers had to call a nurse because a specimen was received that had to be protected from light and frozen within 30 minutes of collection.  The specimen arrived frozen, but unprotected from light.  The nurse didn’t understand the problem, because she had gotten the specimen in the freezer in the 30 minutes.  My co-worker then had to explain that the specimen also needed to either be wrapped in tin foil (not only does it protect the specimen from light, but it protects it from aliens as well), or put into an amber colored tube.

It scares me when things aren’t labeled, or they’re mislabeled.  It scares me when a medical professional doesn’t know that you use a lavender tube to collect a CBC, instead of a serum tube.  It scares me when they don’t know the difference between serum and plasma.  It scares me when they don’t know how to operate a centrifuge.  It scares me when I have to explain something basic to someone who supposedly has more education than I do.  It scares me when people are more interested in discussing their horoscopes, than they are in doing their job correctly.  I don’t care if you’re a Cancer, I care about making sure that the guy with cancer gets prompt and accurate treatment.

I know that mistakes happen.  I know that doctors and nurses are only human.  Sometimes, though, I have to wonder why some of them decided to work in healthcare.  Must be the great hours and the glamorous uniforms.

A Random List of Things I’m Currently Thinking About At 2:30 a.m.

Published May 23, 2014 by ia84

-I really want to see Devil’s Tower.  I know it’s nearly 700 miles away, but I think it would be awesome to just leave after work some Friday night and drive to Wyoming, see Devil’s Tower, and drive back home.  I know it’s crazy, and probably a waste of gas, but it’d be super awesome.

-I’m on a personal mission whenever I watch something on Hulu.  No matter what the ad that is playing, I always mark “No” for the question, “Is this ad relevant to you?”.  So far, it’s not making any difference, but I seriously hope that it’s messing with some Hulu algorithm thing.

-Whenever I house sit, my brain comes up with ridiculous scenarios of things that could happen.  The most common/recurring is that aliens are going to show up.  No abduction or anything.  Just that aliens will suddenly appear.

-Whenever I go on Pinterest, and if I stray onto the DIY & Crafts section I suddenly am filled with the belief that I am crafty.  I’m not.

-Speaking of crafts, I feel the urge to do origami.  Probably a good thing that I’m nowhere near paper right now.

-I kind of want one of those graphic tablets that you use with a computer.  Yeah, apparently I’m on a crafting kick tonight.

-You know what is fantastic about being out of the city and out in the country?  The stars.  There are so many beautiful stars just overwhelming the sky and I adore it.

-You know what’s eerie about being out of the city and out in the country?  The quiet.  It is so amazingly quiet, and when you’re used to the sound of traffic and sirens and trains and such, the quiet can be a little unnerving.

-Who’s got two thumbs and a three day weekend coming up?  This girl!

-I really want to learn archery.  And not just because of The Hunger Games.  It’s a graceful sport.  Plus, I have this weird noise sensitivity issue, so I’m thinking that learning to shoot would be a miserable experience.

-Sometimes I feel like I’m the neediest, clingiest person ever.  It drives me crazy.  It’s not intentional, it just happens.  Which, somehow makes it worse.

-There’s this thing that’s been floating around Facebook lately where people put down what their favorite Bible verse is.  I have many favorite verses, but lately I’ve been loving Philippians 4:8: “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

Revised Emergency Plan

Published January 31, 2013 by ia84

Tonight if aliens invade, or orcas attack, or I find myself suddenly at the mercy of a group of chipmunks who have somehow figured out how to invade my home and climb my loft bed, I have one plan and strategy alone.  I’m just going to lay here in bed and not move.  At all. I am that tired.  I seriously thought earlier that if aliens did invade I’d be super excited because either they would A. be wise and kind and have medical advancement that would be able to deal with my exhaustion and I’d feel fresh and renewed, or B. they shoot and kill me and the disintegration would be quick and I’d be in Heaven, and there would be no more exhaustion.  So, really, win/win.  I’m so tired, I don’t even care that my grammar is lousy tonight.

I still absolutely adore my job, even though it was a bit frustrating tonight.  I had three different people give me completely different sets of instructions about the same exact thing.  I was more than a little confused.  Plus, I felt my inner Sheldon trying so hard to scream, “You’re in my spot!”  Even though spots aren’t assigned at work, we all kind of have certain areas that are more or less our space.  My happens to have all sorts of helpful post-its hanging up with good reminders.  When I came back from supper, one of my coworkers had completely taken over my space.  Inside all I could think was, “You’re in my spot.  You. Are. In. My. Spot.”  Yeah, I’m thinking the counseling center might’ve been on to something by telling me that I have an adjustment disorder.  Anyway, I resisted the urge to actually vocalize my feelings, but I was a bit disappointed when my co-worker left, and didn’t put anything back.  That’s just not polite.  So, not only did I get to clean up the area I was working in, but I also had to put my normal area back in order.    Okay, yeah, I’m whiny and crabby.  I’m thinking I may need sleep.

I’m also thinking that I need to get my chimichanga and white queso on my way to work tomorrow.  I like having something special for lunch on Fridays.

Really Creepy

Published October 11, 2012 by ia84

So, they’ve been running many ads for the anniversary edition of E.T.  Why is this movie so popular?  Surely I’m not the only person who’s really freaked out by the “adorable” alien. The alien from Alien is more adorable.   Just thinking about it gives me the heebie-jeebies.  Someone please explain this mystery to me.

Friday Night Questions

Published August 24, 2012 by ia84

Am I the only one who can’t make it through  Close Encounters of the Third Kind?

Why is the History Channel so obsessed with aliens and U.F.O’s?

Why do ingrown toenails hurt so much?

What’s a good way to fall asleep when it’s really hot?

How are they going to end the Amy and Rory story?

Had Firefly been made now, would it have lasted longer?

How do people master pig latin?