Solving Jar Jar

Published May 10, 2014 by Malia

The other night I was with the boy, and we were watching The New Yoda Chronicles: Escape from the Jedi Temple.  For those that are unaware of it, basically it’s Lego Star Wars.  So, lots of humor and everything is Lego.  Which, some might argue makes it better than actually watching Star Wars, but I digress…

Anyway, in the episode there’s a scene with everyone’s “favorite” character, Jar Jar…and Jar Jar’s three children.  That’s right, Jar Jar apparently met some female Gungan and procreated with her.  I pointed out that maybe if Jar Jar’s significant other was as annoying as he was, they might cancel each other out, and their kids would be perfectly normal.  The boy disagreed since the kids were probably at least 30, and they acted like they were five.  Then, I came up with a solution.  Maybe, Gungan’s age differently than humans.  Maybe Jar Jar didn’t become a mature Gungan until several years after Revenge of the Sith.    Now, before you discount this theory, let’s look at the evidence (and keep in mind, this is all supposition.  I don’t know if there’s actually evidence out there to destroy my theory).

In The Phantom Menace, we first encounter Jar Jar.  He’s annoying, clumsy, and generally irritating.  He’s got more in common with the twelve-year-old Anakin than he does with any of the adults.  Plus, it’s never established that he actually is an adult.  The other Gungans dislike him, and when he’s brought before the leader, no one jumps to his defense.  This could easily be explained if he’s an orphan.  For all we know, Jar Jar was a preteen orphan Gungan, and the Gungans saw that shipping him off with the Jedi’s was an easy way to rid themselves of someone they didn’t want to care for.

When you think of it like that, then everything that happens becomes loads sadder.  Basically, no one checked his age, accepted that he was an adult because he was tall and could talk.  They let him be an ambassador and put the fate of the galaxy in his hands.  Seriously?  What kind of moron lets a kid make those kinds of decisions?  On the other hand, he did come from a planet that boasted a queen who was 14 when she was elected.  But still, there were plenty in the senate not from Naboo, and they should have questioned the wisdom of giving Jar Jar so much responsibility.

That’s it, I move for a vote of “No Confidence” in the representatives from Naboo.

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