There are things I’m discovering as I become an adult, that no one ever warned me about. Bodily things. Unwanted hair things. I remember when I was little, I saw something about how old-timey carnivals would feature things like the bearded lady. I always assumed that the bearded lady was just a lady with a fake beard. As far as I knew, only boys could grow facial hair. Then, I became a grown-up, and discovered that if it was a hundred years ago, I’d have a fair shot at joining the carnival as the bearded lady.
Unwanted facial hair has been an ongoing nuisance for about the last four years. I remember it started with just a few annoying little hairs that were relatively easy to deal with. Then one day, I woke up and apparently the Beard Fairy had been to visit me in the night. Apparently, if you don’t leave something to appease the Beard Fairy, you get “gifted” with your very own starter beard.
Anyway, I’ve spent the better part of the last couple of years with my own 5 o’clock shadow. It hasn’t done much for my self-esteem, that’s for sure. So, after trying many things, I finally decided to give an epilator a try.
For those who don’t know, an epilator is basically a bunch of tweezers all working in unison to make the user cry. Or maybe just to make me cry. I really hate tweezing things, and multiple tweezers working on automatic pilot is really an unpleasant sensation. There’s almost something violent about it. The nice thing is, once you get the hang of using it, you flinch less while using it. It still hurts, but you’re at least prepared for what it’s going to feel like. Plus, for the first time in years, I’m actually making some headway with getting rid of this facial menace.
Now, if I could just get the courage up to use it on the “gift” the Mustache Fairy left me…