Tonight I experienced sharks, sharks, and more sharks. The good, the bad, and the ugly of the world of sharks.
I was hanging out at a friend’s apartment, and we were going to watch a movie. I asked if we could watch Jaws. I’d never actually seen Jaws all the way through. Sure, I’d catch parts when it’s on t.v., but my past viewing has been completely out of order. Since my friend, Katy, loves all things shark, she was more than willing to sit through Jaws.
Jaws is a pretty great film, especially when you consider when it was made. Sure, it was kinda unrealistic, and sure, the Bruce (that’s the shark) that you see in close-up is way bigger than the full body shots of the shark they portray as Bruce. It’s the epic struggle, though, that makes it worthwhile. Plus, there’s some pretty cool cinematography. Although, in retrospect, I’m not sure my first full viewing would’ve been nearly as fun had I been by myself. It’s definitely a film you need to watch with other like-minded people.
About halfway through the film Katy suggested we watch Shark Night next. Shark Night is the very touching story about a group of college students who decide to spend the weekend at the lake. Nothing could possibly go bad, right? Right. Oh wait, things do get a little less charming when the sharks in the lake start nomming on the gang. This ain’t Beach Blanket Bingo, that’s for sure. “But wait,” you’re probably saying, “how can there be sharks? Didn’t you say they’re at a lake?” Why, yes, I did! Not to worry, there’s a perfectly logical explanation given, about halfway through the film. I think this film was the product of someone thinking, “Jaws was really successful, and Deliverance was really disturbing; why not combine them into one film?” Don’t believe me? There was this moment where Katharine McPhee’s character is giving the creepy Deliverance guy an eyeful, and I actually said, “And now we’re showing Deliverance our boobs.” Seriously, if you don’t know what people mean when they call something a “B movie,” watch this and you’ll understand.
After Shark Night we watched one of the Shark Week episodes, Air Jaws. This was actually pretty cool, and educational. Did you know that Great Whites will actually clear the water doing this leap breach thing? It’s ridiculous. I admit I was rooting for the seals and penguins to get away. I know a shark’s gotta eat, but it’s awful watching animals that cute get killed. The vet tech in me wanted to save the injured animals.
All in all, a successful evening, and now I know why I’m single and childless. People in relationships do not watch Jaws and when seeing a dog and a child at the beach, and the ominous familiar music starts to play, say, “Eat the bratty kid! Not the dog!”